Note, this is a bit of a rant about how the mind revolves around stupid insolvable problems such as stupid people and stupid choices… if you wish not to read this, carry on! I will have a better read next time 🙂
I find that on the slow days, where there isn’t much to do except monotonous work that my head will wander with thoughts of almost anything, like knitting, books, life goals, music, but occasionally my head gets stuck into problem solving mode. This can be great! Except when its trying to solve stupid people. Its usually the same person for about two years, and all I can think of is how they live, what they have done, and to try and figure out why they did the things they have done. I wont get into it, as it could end up being a very long rant, but needless to say, some people I let into my life confuse the hell out of me!
This latest one is slowly going away, but things make it reappear. This person is a mother who ended up in this situation after a long list of bad choices, and it keeps coming back to my head as talk of starting a family myself is a current issue. So what do I end up doing? Comparing myself with her, her actions, what she has done, having arguments in my head about how to correct her obvious mistakes, and how to make her a better person. Is this what my purpose in life is? Will this person listen to me? NO! Bloody f*ing N O! So in the end I am stuck wondering how the hell my head is stuck revolving around this person and their choices of actions in life…
I guess it ends up coming down to, how to clear my head, when you are stuck in doing nothing to entertain yourself or keep your head busy and out of the stupid holes in your thoughts!!!
I wish to forgive this person, and all the countless ones before her, even as so much as they believe they have made good choices and are not wrong, inproper, or lacking sense or rational thought. I wish to move on and not think of them but my head keeps revolving around them! Something come along and interrupt this thought train I am on with something entertaining and amusing!!!