Sorry to see you go, Dont let the Door hit you on the Way Out

I had the unfortunate turn around of seeing a coworker leave after it started to turn ugly. Now, I believe that any situation can be dealt with, and possibly turned around with the right problem solving skills. I have tried twice now to try and give these skills to other co-workers who have left angrily, upset about what they believe are horrible conditions, situations, and unbelievable stories. Instead of dealing with the situation, or confronting it, they end up ignoring it, acting and behaving inappropriately, and ending up fired, or leaving with such anger that they believe it was all everyone else fault. But lets look at what they could have done to confront the situation?

1) Write down all the issues, problems and situations that have bothered you, and why!

2) For each of the above written points, write down three ways to solve, fix, or change the situation for the better, not just for you but for everyone. Make sure these are plausible, effective, and for good effort, explain why this solution will work.

3) Now that you have some solutions, go to the person in charge, or the person(s) you need to confront. Ask them if they can sit with you, that the time is correct and effective, if needed bring in an unbiased mediator. Then sit, say you have some issues, and get at it. If needed, leave your notes with that person for them to think it over, and please ask them for a reply within a certain plausible amount of time.

4) Listen to their solutions, reasons, and answers. Actually take time to listen. Do NOT shut them down because they seem to be ignorant, or you feel you are not being taken seriously. They have listened to you, take time to listen to them.

5) If all parties are willing to come to an agreement, then work towards it! Find a goal, set the plan, and implement!

Unfortunately, sometimes not all parties can agree, sometimes the situation cannot be resolved and it is best to walk away, but try to do so without burning bridges or flying out with all demons loosed. To my co-worker that is leaving and doing so, I leave this message:

I am sorry that you felt you could not come to me with your concerns. I am sorry that you are so angry that you cannot see me as a friend. I am sorry you are leaving, instead of trying to work out this situation. Good luck with the next turn your path in life will take.

It’s a Bird! It’s a plane! No, its ‘Super’ Ocarina!

I have fallen for the ocarina.  Its a neat little chambered instruments, that because of its rigidity comes in all sorts of shapes, sizes, tunes, and colors.  It can be an amazing what finds you can dig up, of ocarinas that are decades old, homemade decadents, or even artistic pieces.  But sometimes, you find a twist in something that really makes you shake your head.

Now, a lot of the ocarina love comes from a Zelda game called Ocarina of Time, where a young boy uses a magical ocarina to change times, summon his horse, call his friend, or warp to certain points of the map.  Its amazing! So a lot of the gamers, collectors and nerds starting finding Zelda ocarinas IRL (in real life) so they too could be as magical as Link and Zelda.  More love comes from flute players who are in love with the basics of flute history, with its cousin the Xun and various other instruments as such (over twenty varieties if you wish to start with the basics, possibly hundreds of different types after that!)

Now, there are few great sellers in this western hemisphere who can cater to your ocarina collecting needs, my favorite being http://www.songbirdocarina.com . This site is smaller and has more unique items that are affordable, my favorite being the double harmonic that is so challenging but greatly fun to learn!

Now, there is another site that is more towards the market needs, and towards what they think the consumer will charge for.  Now, don’t get me wrong, I have ordered from their site, like their Zelda rupee ocarina and their teacarina! But one thing that shocks me, is their superhero ocarina.  http://www.stlocarina.com/suoc.html with their caption ‘awaken your inner hero’. You can choose from five ocarinas that have a cover of Thor, Spiderman, Captain America, Wolverine, or Iron Man.  But what have they to do with the ocarina, or a flute? Nothing.  Zip. So why does this supplier have the idea to market super heroes on this tradition instrument that in the past decades has never been commercialized? They are trying to hit a new generation that has been taken by storm by the hero’s of today. Sounds like a great idea, but at the same time, this traditional loving musician doesn’t understand it.   I may be one of the view too, as most of these super hero ocarinas are out of stock, screaming that this ploy is working.  I wonder if in years to come it will be more popular to have a Thor ocarina, than to understand where it all started?

 

What is the Point of Facebook?

 

I realized the other day, that something is what you make of it. For some, facebook is a place to connect, talk to friends, find old friends, or find new. But then there are the other sad, amusing or constnat faces of the site:

1) The sharer – They constantly push all the awesome pictures, blips, videos, statuses or quizzes they find. Do you want all this ? Possibly, one of ten maybe…. Maybe you would like to actually hear about them!

2) The mother – everything they find in their day time, their children, their moments, are blogged onto this 24/7 update of their life. You may not want to know that little johnny as just learned to spit up, but you cannot unread what you just read!

3) The opinionater – They are constantly voicing their opinion of anything, everything and constantly. They constantly have to express their opinion on something that happened, and they tend to do it in a way that makes you wish they would shhhhhh.

4) The gamer – they constantly are playing their games, poking you for help so they can afford their new upgrade, hoping you will send them free stuff so they need not invest actual money into it.

5) The drama queen – constantly have to update every moment of everyone else’s lives, their anger, their sadness, their moments that apparently are buzz worthy for everyone they don’t actually talk to.

6) Motivator – They will only update if its to help someone, pass on some bit of advice, or heck are willing to make you feel better. You may not know what’s actually happening in their life, as they tend not to post about it.

7) The constant updater – if you don’t know what they have done in the past hour, then they must be sick!

8) The non facer – they have a page, they are occasionally on their, but honestly, they have friend requests from months ago and their last update was three years ago.

9) The stalker – they always are checking out what’s going on, digging up old friends, lovers, haters, and things that just don’t need to be found. But hey, someone should be doing it! Right?

10) The business minded – they have their pages/their work site, updates for coupons, work talk, or just fun. Great way to get the word out, as long as its not too annoying to make people block you.

Now, this is what I made of it, trying to put a fun spin on a weird thing that we didn’t have ten years ago, but most people wouldn’t know what to do if it shut down! There may be more faces to the book, but hey, this is who I get to meet when I log on, if you have any others feel free to add on!